Keep in mind as long as you place yourself in the “midst of access” you will continue to be taken advantage of. You must totally and completely walk away, especially when you know it’s no longer (or not) love. Yes! you’re going to be “inconvenienced” in the flesh , yes you’re going to be lonely for a minute, yes it’s going to feel like death, but in order to get to the “true life” that God has for you, you must have the surgery in order to have this thing removed from you. You must do it! I know you don’t want a scar because they have to operate. I know you don’t want to do the months of painful rehab, but it’s absolutely necessarily.
Say YES to the surgery, get your buns on that table and get this thing cut out of you. This is a thing that has invaded your spirit and your life is on hold as long as you’re connected to it.