You’re deeply attached to someone in private but you can’t flow in the open. Their paperwork is not right and your paperwork is not right so your love is in private. You love the Lord and don’t desire to to live a life that is not pleasing to Him but this is the situation that you’re currently in and while you enjoy your private time together you truly hate all of the ducking and dodging, all of the pretending, all of the deception. It’s difficult to pray because you know in this particular stage that God won’t sign off on this particular relationship that you’re in, especially the intimacy that the two of you have to sneak to share.
You can’t even respond to this post like you would like to because it might prompt someone to get into your personal business. You’re in flux and it’s a difficult place to be.